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Quality Quotes from 41ers

We couldn’t possibly be this stupid if we had nothing else to do.
  • Pitch: “That moment when you decide to wear a blue shirt instead of red, I have power!”
  • Dollop: “Paint me like one of your Italian men.”
  • Yurt: “Cool people always use the back door.”
  • Snickerdoodle: “'Official' is a scary word... 'Permission' is a scary word too.”
  • Toboggan: “Ain't nothing falling out of my French burrito.”
  • Yurt: “My mom always made me think I was large.”
  • Stripes: “Every time I see your face I'm tempted.”
  • Dollop: “Wear what you would wear to a casual first date with your cousin.”
  • Wumbo: “I'm not wishing ill, I'm just not wishing him well.”
  • Squawk: “Howdy is dating you in female form.”
  • Toboggan: “You wanna lick my fingers?”
  • Protocol: “I'm like a 40 year old mom when it come to chocolate.”
  • Patella: “I break things man, I just do.”
  • Dollop: “SpaceX, brought to you by obnoxious women.”
  • Howdy: “I'm gonna throw my tongue at you!”
  • Drongo: “Let me get my calculator, then we'll fight.”
  • Pitch: “If life gives you lemons, give life aids.”
  • Squawk: “Don't date someone you're not.”
  • Alamo: “You know it's a good Sunday when you make it out of church with only two death threats.”
  • Squawk: “I'll show you average!!”
  • Stripes: “I already have a bunch of parasites crawling around in my space... it's called... you.”
  • Yeast: “I can sand paper the heck out of your face.”
  • Snake: “Your shirt just birthed two socks.”
  • Drongo: “HBCB: hot babes covered in barley.”
  • Cactus: “I'm perfect husband material. Go ahead and wife me up boys.”
  • Wobble: “I don't want that demon to occupy me, I want to occupy that demon.”
  • Iceberg: “I think that much making out counts as a date.”
  • Yurt: “That's just bad parenting. Releasing your kids into the wild.”
  • Surge: “I want a dog that i can ride into battle on!”
  • Stripes: “My job is to take an idea and make it weird.”
  • Pitch: “For a class with so many compliments you'd think we were n a class for Canadian citizenship.”
  • Dollop: “Dude. Fuzzy gum. There's a market for that right?”
  • Cactus: “Hey are you thirsty? I'm asking for a friend.”
  • Patella: “Don't make engineering paper seductive. I should never see seductive engineering paper.”
  • Trireme: “If you actually did your homework, you would probably be used to doing your homework, and you wouldn't forget to do your homework.”
  • Yurt: “I'm saving my Achilles heel for my wife.”
  • Hambone: “What's a grilled cheese? It's a waste of two pieces of bread and cheese.”
  • Snooze: “I forgot to bring a Barbie... I mean, I don't own a Barbie.”
  • Stripes: “I put my bra on one sleeve at a time like the rest of you.”
  • Stripes: “Ahh... This lighting, this music, this queso... I need a blunt.”
  • Rolex: “Over there they have those yellow phone shaped bananas. They're bananas.”
  • Iceberg: “Wait stop. Go back two faces.”
  • Dollop: “I could marry a girl without arms. That's not even important.”
  • Snake: “Women, a better choice.”
  • Hambone: “Yeet.”
  • Rolex: “Now you got me hittin' up the Bob the Builder wiki.”
  • Surge: “It be nips out.”
  • Dollop: “Go-go-gadget, adult diaper!”
  • Bam-Bam: “That's why I'm called Bam-bam, you can hit me as many times as you like.”
  • Surge: “They don’t want the government to do yoga.”
  • Cattywampus: “Oh wait, nipples.”
  • Pitch: “The answer was wine.”
  • Cattywampus: “If only we can print synthetic meats.”
  • Swoop: “Oh that’s fine. You're just going to be more screwed. That's all.”
  • Cactus: “I'm going to get a 41 tramp stamp. Get those nice butterfly wings and everything.”
  • Nessie: “Two stepping is really easy. It's only two steps.”
  • Sequoia: “Hey Patella, you want to get coffee in a non-gay way?”
  • Drongo: “Thomas Hall is different from Tyler Hall just like your home is different from prison.”
  • Yeast: “This is music I could sweep to.”
  • Rotor: “Girls dig blind men.”
  • Squawk: “I have absolutely nothing. All I do is date a Lumberjack.”
  • Rolex: “Who would turn down a Dollop lap? I sure wouldn't.”
  • Swoop: “No one ever respects the alfredo.”
  • Snake: “Come on Hambone, let's go put your skirt on.”
  • Drongo: “Can we name someone Squat so his dad could be Papa Squat?”
  • Patella: “I force myself to be pessimistic so I'll be happy with my grades.”
  • Cactus: “If I was pregnant right now I'd give birth on my birthday.”
  • Dollop: “Not a chance, Suburban white mom!”
  • Surge: “It sounds like a terrified three year old is trying to escape your body.”
  • Dollop: “I swear you talk more with your eyes than with your mouth.”
  • Ozone: “With great victory comes little sleep.”
  • Toboggan: “Wait! Hug me… like this.”
  • Wannahockaloogie: “Yay! Anti-Frick!”
  • Stitch: “Its hard to make bank when youre dead.”
  • Dollop: “You're a freaking giraffe Surge, you don’t need to tread water.”
  • Haikou: “I will [come visit] if I ever get the chance. At the moment, I only exist on the internet.”
  • Surge: “Logically, there's no way to spike with the nipples.”
  • Trireme: “Come to the dark side. We have long hours and slavery.”
  • Snooze: “Noo! Too much booty!”
  • Yurt: “Lets put that in our chock pot of thought and let it simmer on low.”
  • Patella: “Never go against an Irishman when coffee's on the line.”
  • Squawk: “I'm gonna pull my gun and start stabbing.”
  • Yeast: “No man, this sexy bod can't take that.”
  • Yeast: “I have his nipples.”
  • Wobble: “I was distracted by Yeast's hips.”
  • Tremor: “Maybe thats what's wrong with my head”
  • Howdy: “Aww dang it, poopy”
  • Howdy: “I can count to 3 but I can't count to 5”
  • Yeast: “This booty shines through most pants.”
  • Patella: “Is that a Nebrasken mating dance there?”
  • Pitch: “The way he swings his hips makes it look like he played football in San Francisco.”
  • Drongo: “If you judge based on the purchases of my feet I'm good.”
  • Iceberg: “I'm a disney princess.”
  • Protocol: “I only remember 8 names and get paid for it.”
  • Tsunami: “My hips don’t's gyrate well enough.”
  • Patella: “You ruined all the fun of pulling large men off couches.”
  • Dollop: “You sell corduroy garters”
  • Flint: “That’s the second time I've blown up a bomb with my body.”
  • Wannahockaloogie: “No one cares if Cactus gets AIDS.”
  • Alamo: “In the future, please try not to spank me when I'm with my girlfriend.”
  • Cattywampus: “If I was naked, falling from the sky, you wouldn’t be able to see me.”
  • Cattywampus: “He's only good at being a girl.”
  • Patella: “You and I have compatable legs.”
  • Squawk: “I mean I like a potato but I don’t know if I would drink a potato.”
  • Dollop: “Hey man, go get your wet on.”
  • Tsunami: “It's a freaking palindrome. I'm passionate about my tacocat.”
  • Cactus: “Man I hate it when people spoil primitive technology for me.”
  • Dollop: “Jokes on you, his hand is a eunuch.”
  • Yeast: “No you will not draw on my back.”
  • Yurt: “Romance is actin just in slow motion.”
  • Pitch: “Theres only so much pancake the human mouth can take.”
  • Dollop: “I've been sweating profusely from the knee to belly-button range.”
  • Flint: “Would those be pant, perhaps?”
  • Flint: “Men's pant, other leg sold seperately.”
  • Pitch: “I got deception bubbled in baby.”
  • Flint: “What is the definition of bread?”
  • Patella: “He's my lab partner, I don’t want to have to hit him with a reciprocating engine.”
  • Yeast: “Id rather be licked by a dog than by you.”
  • Howdy: “These giggle games, they're tearing us apart.”
  • Cactus: “My inner dyslexia said ‘Rob the blind old man.’”
  • Cactus: “Yeah Boi, tuberculosis.”
  • Tsunami: “I shall rub myself on you.”
  • Pitch: “A nine volt. Feel the tingle.”
  • Iceberg: “The tutu's got to us.”
  • Snake: “Why are your hands wet and cold?”
  • Dollop: “They are not my lips. They are not in the catalog.”
  • Snake: “My dress is too big…”
  • Alpine: “Medicine child locks always baffle me.”
  • Beep: “I can't do anything. I have socks on.”
  • Wobble: “I need a woman with a body like yours [Cookie].”
  • Pitch: “I hear a lot of Chinese speakers hate English.”
  • Dollop: “Peer pressure is only good if it's drugs.”
  • Iceberg: “Question, am cat. Jump?”
  • Dollop: “There's this cool mod for a gamecube... It doesn't work but you can do it.”
  • Dollop: “Ain't that just like a woman?”
  • Cactus: “I don't want to bleed out of my navel.”
  • Iceberg: “It sounds like you punched a two year old.”
  • Rotor: “I need more limbs.”
  • Beep: “I've just gotta deal with the nipples.”
  • Alpine: “Hindsight is... too late..”
  • Cactus: “Happy birthday Iceberg. I bought you a baby.”
  • Dollop: “Chicken does not come in triangles.”
  • Snake: “I'm going to tickle you and pull your socks down.”
  • Yurt: “Who is that hot hunk of man flesh.”
  • Tsunami: “Taste my feet and weep.”
  • Snickerdoodle: “Now there's a man with a clean urinary tract.”
  • Rango: “I'm glad I grew up redneck as hell. Pretty good times.”
  • Swoop: “I like your shirt... and your body...”
  • Patella: “I guess you could say he has a.. 'special'.. relationship with his sister.”
  • Stripes: “Someday, you'll have a wife who has a beard as luscious as mine.”
  • Stripes: “Wake me another man.”
  • Pitch: “The only reason I'm becoming an engineer is so I can make enough money to make a lot of money in Vegas.”
  • Stripes: “I'm a chip.”
  • Raven: “I can get a confession out of him... and it doesn't involve spooning.”
  • Hambone: “I would never use my beard as a bribe, it's too dangerous.”
  • Yurt: “When I get cold, I feel high.”
  • Wannahockaloogie: “I don't really get tan, I just get less white.”
  • Stripes: “Ponding is like birth. ITS TIME!!”
  • Iceberg: “I have been forcibly moved to make love to your guitar.”
  • Wannahockaloogie: “I only buy legos and food.”
  • Tremor: “I don't know what I'm doing anymore.”
  • Yurt: “Don't kill me, I'm so young and beardless.”
  • Tsunami: “Dude, crispy angles.”
  • Patella: “I am the last Samurai.”
  • Snooze: “I am the last Patella.”
  • Wannahockaloogie: “Don't try to understand Cactus, it's bad for your health.”
  • Cactus: “I would burn down a forest just for the smell.”
  • Kolache: “Where you come from, sexy man?”
  • Wannahockaloogie: “Milk my thumbs.”
  • Stripes: “Bessie?? Is she a heifer.”
  • Surge: “Spread your legs Boba it's more comfortable.”
  • Surge: “You need to build up your resistance to epilepsy.”
  • Howdy: “Has your girlfriend tried to set you up with anyone recently?”
  • Surge: “Frickin' WHAM!!!”
  • Hambone: “You can't flimflam the zimzam.”
  • Snake: “What the heck is a zimzam?”
  • Trireme: “Responsibility is the opium of life.”
  • Surge: “Where we're going we don't need... pants...”
  • Hambone: “They don't think it be like it is, but it do.”
  • Pitch: “Young people die too.”
  • Yurt: “It was good but I wouldn't kill my mom for it.”
  • Rango: “I'm going to spray it with bleach, and if its alive, it will be dead soon.”
  • Cactus: “I smell like other people's farts.”
  • Rotor & Beep: “We may not know how to shop, but we are men, we can definitely pack.”
  • Loop: “That was fun, I want to get high now.”
  • Cactus: “Who wet my pants?”
  • Tether: “Long story short, lemon people.”
  • Haiku: “The only thing I can think of that is black and fuzzy is a bear... or Rhamnos.”
  • Ergo: “Frankly, my cabbage, I don't give a damn.”
  • Syntax: “Tickling does not help my ethos! Tickling does not help my ethos!”
  • Redox: “Yeah, he just needs to die.”
  • Ergo: “Don't bit the hand that feeds your foot!”
  • Syntax: “I would like the option of a porcelain toilet that is NOT attached to my legs!”
  • Ergo: “Psychology is a more stable form of Redox.”
  • Tuk tuk: “My mom told me to be nice to people who can shoot guns.”
  • Mana: “Ctrl-F Shiny, now!”
  • Haiku: “I would like to be your friend, but I WILL punch you.”
  • Mana: “No, my one weakness: spinning! And missiles!”
  • Haiku: “One of them might not have been a zombie… they may have just been a girl.”
  • Syntax: “Are you guys bonding over intestinal disorders?”
  • Tether: “I guess we could take all of the Walmarts and put them in space, and it would be its own Death Star of Bargains!”
  • Spark: “That hit the nail on the hammer!”
  • Tether: “My kid’s an honor student… my kid has a tank!”
  • Summit: “You said dangerous, but I think you mispronounced delicious.”
  • Ergo: “Snaps are magic.”
  • Haiku: “I felt lonely because they took 1 minute to reply. That’s like 2 coffee days!”
  • Tumbler: “I don't like sudo! It doesn't make me any sandwiches!”
  • Gyro: “Turn that zombification into incarnation.”
  • Syntax: “It’s amazing what a lack of sleep and a sailor costume will do to your self-confidence.”
  • Tether: “Yes, but you need more unicorns.”
  • Ergo: “I swear, if my quote is not on the wall, I will beat you over the head with our milk.”
  • Tumbler: “I can ride my car with no handlebars!”
  • Haiku: “It takes a fire to raze a building.”
  • Tether: “I could be an engineer… Ow my eye!”
  • Mana: “Priceless won’t pay your bail.”
  • Tumbler: “I’ll call your brisket and raise you a jellyfish.”
  • Chisel: “I’d rather have my knife than my wallet.”
  • Tumbler: “Ok! To do list… Poop!”
  • Bacon: “He has a broken mind. It’s warped and twisted and needs to be fixed. Does anybody have hammer?”
  • Tumbler: “Dang administrative dragons…”
  • Spark: “I don’t like to have fun.”
  • Haiku: “I think that’s the longest I’ve stood in someone’s shower with the intent to kill them.”
  • Bacon: “I said that? I thought so.”
  • Bacon: “I agree with Tuk-Tuk for once… Whoa I feel dirty now!”
  • Tuk Tuk: “I’m going to be the voice of wisdom now.”
  • Atlas: “When I go looking for swords, I go to the Davis Dumpster.”
  • Atlas: “If I can eat it, it will make sense.”
  • Zephyr: “I’ll try not to walk around on my eyeballs…”
  • Lasso: “I’m not going to pull out pom-poms and a skirt, if that’s what you mean.”
  • Beta: “That’s why we elect Gabe Newell president: we’ll never have to worry about World War III!”
  • Bacon: “There’s a bunch in… that one country that starts with an Australia.”
  • Syntax: “You know you have problems when your armpits have grandchildren.”
  • Haiku: “That makes sense, because you kind of turn into a transcendent space goat.”
  • Fedora: “You saved the world from obesity and creepy clowns with one shield bash!”
  • Haiku: “Well, I’ve never heard anyone cat-call after a piranha-stuffed whale before.”
  • Haiku: “Everything gets a little hazy when a girl’s involved.”
  • Tuk Tuk: “Girlfriends are people too.”
  • Rhamnos: “Hey honey, let’s go rent a room that smells like a dirty gym sock.”
  • Bacon: “It clears my sinuses- and my eyeballs.”
  • Syntax: “My brain just gave me a free cookie!”
  • Spark: “Computers always have issues… like people.”
  • Atlas: “God uses the metric system.”
  • Chisel: “Then you have a cape and become super ninja!”
  • Sabian: “I’m no… communist.”
  • Spark: “I still don’t understand 3-phase fire.”
  • Zephyr: “My butt has god-like powers!”
  • Rhamnos: “Does the other guy in my head have to be schizophrenic too?”
  • Bacon: “I’m an egg-salad sandwich!”
  • Syntax: “That’s like someone breaking into your house while covered in pastries!”
  • Haiku: “Grass is always greener… when you can EAT it!”
  • Trigger: “If a woman really loves you, she’ll accept you for your tractor.”
  • Beta: “Don’t make me laugh while I’m eating cheese or we’ll all die!”
  • Syntax: “They make cannibalism cute!”
  • Plume : “Cute girls are rarely productive.”
  • Tuk Tuk: “I have a healthy fear of nuclear warheads, grenades and Dr. Adonyi.”
  • Zephyr: “The sun is the giant death ball of life.”
  • Serif: “Growing up is always harder than growing down.”
  • Plume: “If you start purring, I WILL punch you!”
  • Haiku: “Note: Gravity still goes down.”
  • Bacon: “I was hoping for something more exciting… like blasphemy!”
  • Syntax: “Due to a change in my reference point, you are now me.”
  • Haiku : “The aging process makes a cheese great but metal makes a cheese greater”
  • Zephyr: “It’s not a floor run, it’s spontaneous indoor rugby.”
  • Vox: “There's no fun without tyranny.”
  • Syntax: “The probabilities have been skewered tonight.”
  • Codex: “Thank you non-conductive unrealistic tree.”
  • Shutter: “Real life has a wonderful physic engine.”
  • Syntax: “It's always nice to have a well trained couch.”
  • Plume: “I'm not decrepit, I'm just old.”
  • Wrench: “I just had surgery, I can't explode tomorrow.”
  • Bacon: “Fire doesn't do what deer does.”
  • Codex: “There is a disturbing lack of noms.”
  • Garuda: “Wharf, come help us beat each other up!”
  • Syntax: “Quick! Someone make me a speech bubble out of pizza!”
  • Snake: “Look! It's our burgers in vapor form.”
  • Haiku: “Oh, my watch is slightly behind the five minutes ahead it's supposed to be.”
  • Lock: “That's the best quote since the potato!”
  • Bacon: “No, I'm being depressed. You're ruining the mood...”
  • Syntax: “If you ever take a dump that clogs one of these toilets, I WILL sing about it.”
  • Fedora: “Being a substitute teacher is like being a warden, superhero, AND a mercenary.”
  • Chisel: “I would give you money if I were one of your grandmas”
  • Claw: “Girls are like gnomes, they go inside holes and disappear.”
  • Knuckles: “What if your wife bares me as a child?”
  • Bacon: “It's not so much the ingenuity that sets them apart anymore... It's more the rotting flesh.”
  • Plume: “I will have to consult the laundry monies...”
  • Cloak: “This is what happens when a 41er doesn't sit at the 41 table... The world slowly implodes.”
  • Dagger: “Think around the corner of the box.”
  • Tuk Tuk: “Did somebody spike his grape juice?”
  • Beetle Juice: “I could replace my iPhone with a sticky-pad, a calendar, and a slinky”
  • Spark: “I will trade one potato... for Dictatorship”
  • Scribbles: “Mullets are the only hairstyle punishable by death.”
  • Dagger: “All Canadian noses come with retractable beaver teeth.”
  • Bacon: “I could have sworn he had a gall bladder; I thought I checked that!”
  • Scribbles: “Unlike Bacon, you cannot block bullets with apathy”
  • Syphon: “I'm staring into your soul... It looks like salad.”
  • Newt: “That hurt me right in the childhood.”
  • Fedora: “Hats and guns and leather and Joy!”
  • Bacon: “I'm not getting mad I'm getting even.......MADDER!”
  • Rhamnos: “Oh my gosh! I LOVE snarks!”
  • Kumho: “You can't keep making Darth Vader pee his pants!”
  • Bacon: “See? I removed all your pain by removing all your brain!”
  • Tumbler: “I've been killed more times then I care to think about.”
  • Rhamnos: “I'm using circular reasoning, which means it's defended from all sides, right?”
  • Dagger: “Your hard drive might be a little disconnected...”
  • Newt: “Out of all things fruit, I detest strawberry Fanta the most...”
  • Tumbler: “Instant guests, just add chocolate!”
  • Bacon: “It looks like cocoa powder, but it smells like fire!”
  • Fedora: “Snarfity snarf. In conclusion wub-dub.”
  • Zephyr: “It's not that they think dancing is dangerous, they just don't want us to embarrass ourselves.”
  • Bacon: “Oh yeah, I forgot I had amnesia.”
  • Wrench: “Nothing I say ever ends up on the quote wall.”
  • Newt: “Because everybody knows, bananas make bad games”
  • Rosin: “It's genuine leather from a plastic cow!”
  • Bacon: “Remember, we're making a four dimensional circle right now...”
  • Summit: “There's a big difference between a man and Chuck Norris.”
  • Dagger: “Oh no I've been hugged! -9 HP.”
  • Scribbles: “I makes less sense in context.”
  • Rhamnos: “I find your psychological condition amusing!”
  • Wrench: “I love you-but not in the food kind of way.”
  • Dagger: “Now I feel like kicking a wall with my head!”
  • Fedora: “It's like every time she sneezes a unicorn is born!”
  • Kumho: “Submit to the SAGA cookie!”
  • Bacon: “If I could choose one word to describe myself, it would be cute; But next one would be apathetic.”
  • Plasma: “Integrated and Duct Tape are virtually synonyms”
  • Penguin: “I'm not above using airsoft claymores...”
  • Tuk tuk: “Don't be a Tuk-tuk.”
  • Summit: “Oh no girls! Evasive maneuvers!”
  • Serif: “Uneducated? What's that?”
  • Plasma: “I like being hyper; it's more fun!”
  • Tumbler: “I would fall over and die, but I'm on a schedule.”
  • Rhamnos: “I'm not a bad person, I'm a biologist!”
  • Dagger: “Calling that a climax is like looking over the Sahara desert, picking out an ant, and saying 'This is the highest point.'”
  • Atlas: “Nihilism... There's nothing to it!”
  • Bacon: “I'm not sure derailing is the proper course of action at this juncture.”
  • Plasma: “Curse my high metabolism!”
  • Tumbler: “You don't have to change your perfectionism, you just have to redefine perfection!”
  • Scribbles: “I ran really fast and when I stopped I discovered that socks have no traction.”
  • Dizzy: “I can taste your judgement from here and it doesn't taste like strawberries.”
  • Rhamnos: “I miss flying. I just tried to lower the flaps on my car.”
  • Scribbles: “Don't worry, you have Main Character privileges...”
  • Bacon: “Did you just assault me with the U.S. Constitution?”
  • Tumbler: “Your cowardice is impressive sir!”
  • Dagger: “Oops, I hope I didn't overwrite Windows...”
  • Summit: “I am a master of fake Kung-Fu.”
  • Bacon: “I have no idea what this is, but it actually tastes pretty good.”
  • Grey: “It is very difficult to reverse engineer a cake.”
  • Flare: “I just beat you with knowledge!”
  • Plasma: “Don't interrupt me, but if you do bring Twizzlers!”
  • Tumbler: “The only difference between hardwired and modular is some solder and wire clippers!”
  • Hopps: “Quick, somebody get a fork and clear his air passage!”
  • Grey: “In the beginning, there was fjord!”
  • Bacon: “I want a clock that turns the world upside down.”
  • Paco: “Spandex makes everything more original.”
  • Knuckles: “All passengers on board for calculus. Please keep you hands inside your head.”
  • Dizzy: “Life would be so much easier if everyone had their own energy shield.”
  • Bacon: “By bald do you mean no hair, or lots and lots of hair?”
  • Plasma: “My subconscious is going to feed your subconscious tacos!”
  • Tumbler: “I'm not very good at this whole living thing.”
  • Bacon: “Kittens in slow motion will improve any day.”
  • Zoot: “A lot of people get a doctorate's degree and then go save a forest or something.”
  • Shutter: “A cookie could collapse and kill millions of people.”
  • Touché: “The water is soggy.”
  • Fedora: “That's called breaking a person's neck, and it's frowned upon in most societies.”
  • Play doh: “I'm fine with being crazy as long as it pays well.”
  • Knuckles: “I hit myself in the head with a mallet, and I was like, 'Ouch! This hurts!'”
  • Tumbler: “My previously only black and white printer is now an only white and white printer.”
  • Playdoh: “Die, you abomination to the color palette.”
  • Paco: “I've added a person to the freezer.”
  • Knuckles: “I wonder what a cookie would taste like if you baked it for nine months...”
  • Tumbler: “If you're going to push me out of a plane, you BETTER let me see--I want to enjoy my death!.”
  • Paco: “Star Destroyers ALWAYS beat peach cobbler.”
  • Dagger: “All I have to do to get encouraged is look at your empire.”
  • Treads: “Cupcakes in the shower are hard to pull off--but it is possible.”
  • Paco: “I spent more money on tea than I did on my girlfriend.”
  • Tumbler: “I'm a computer science major--I don't have verbal skills.”
  • Plasma: “Shooting yourself in the foot is dangerous when you have your foot in your mouth.”
  • Tumbler: “You're the best roommate's girlfriend ever!”
  • Wharf: “Shutter will kill me, but it won't be the first time.”
  • Synk: “You gotta have the hook-ups to get the dead people.”
  • Tumbler: “It's okay, I relocated my brain to my left hand.”
  • Paco: “Girlfriends rarely end in your well-being.”
  • Play doh: “Biology beat you to the banana.”
  • Joust: “Food is meant to be pie.”
  • Wharf: “Wow! Adrenaline is expensive!”
  • Tumbler: “So much grease. So much Yum!”
  • Plasma: “If you die, can I have your Ramen?”
  • Tumbler: “The only fugitives around here are girls.”
  • Paco: “It's not awkward after you're dead.”
  • Fedora: “I'm dodging calculus like a ninja.”
  • Plasma: “Don't complain about the hardware; re-solder it to your liking.”
  • Knuckles: “Oh, I know why I'm tired. I took a stupid sleeping pill earlier!”
  • Plasma: “The internet is a stupendous feat.”
  • Paco: “Ah yes, I owe myself money.”
  • Play doh: “I like the future I'm envisioning. It makes little children cry.”
  • Plasma: “It is, except in cases when it is not.”
  • Tumbler: “Whoa! Look, here's a list. Let's go to Wal-Mart!.”
  • Knuckles: “That sounds cool and despotic...like something Apple would do.”
  • Shutter: “You can say, 'out of order until soon.'”
  • Wharf: “I can be in two places at once again--it's a lot easier than four.”
  • Gauge: “Wind-powered jetpacks! The faster you go, the faster you go!”
  • Penguin: “I was genetically predisposed to be a nerd.”
  • Glyph: “If it screams, it's definitely not a cookie.”
  • Tumbler: “Whoever invented the sandwich must be a rich dead guy by now.”
  • Synk: “We need to do everything we possibly can for high explosives...I mean honor your monarch.”
  • Glyph: “What do you know, I have feet!.”
  • Crikey: “You're stuck between 47 and 32--it's not that great.”
  • Fedora: “Are you going to start the intramural sumo league?...I'll join.”
  • Tumbler: “I might be a nerd, but I'm a practical nerd.”
  • Synk: “Chicago style pizza is like lasagna with a handle.”
  • Wharf: “That's assuming happiness isn't subject to inflation.”
  • Plasma: “Warning: posting on Facebook early in the morning may result in loss of pop-tarts.”
  • Shutter: “Whoa! The Hudson Bay is huge! Who put all that water there?”
  • Glyph: “Bacon's the best thing that ever happened to the burger--except maybe beef.”
  • Crikey: “I'll help him unless Grey killed me.”
  • Glyph: “If you put caffeine in the lemonade, you'll have a lot less secrets.”
  • Summit: “I tried sleep; it didn't work for me.”
  • Touché: “This is not a fire hazard, it's an obstacle course.”
  • Synk: “If you come here for an M.R.S. degree, every day is a career fair.”
  • Gauge: “I heard you chewing then I looked at the crayons and I thought, 'that's not healthy.'”
  • Paco: “I resign my position as floor capacitor.”
  • Synk: “This whole, like, trusting me--it's gotta stop.”
  • Forge: “Women rarely aid a situation.”
  • Shutter: “Somebody spiked the Ramen.”
  • Forge: “That's baby for Never give up! Never Surrender!”
  • Grey: “Eventually you will succumb to the harmonious cheese-sayers.”
  • Synk: “What is this desire to do something feel like? I don't think I've ever actually had it.”
  • Crikey: “You look like you're as special as I am--let's talk about this.”
  • Shutter: “A lot of it was Gauge, while juggling Treads' breakfast.”
  • Shutter: “It's 9:19. I have approximately...a lot of hours...before it's due.”
  • Pyrex: “It's like daydreaming, except more public.”
  • Treads: “How much popcorn can you fit in Bose' ears?”
  • Synk: “You don't get my eyeballs.”
  • Treads: “I've always wanted a suicide note of my very own.”
  • Pyrex: “That's another thing about big cars--when you meet small car, you win.”
  • Shutter: “Hazardous cargo? We've got Pyrex.”
  • Pyrex: “You can get a new wireless mouth.”
  • Pyrex: “Engagement is a much more immediate problem.”
  • Riff: “I was busy trying to ward off our room.”
  • Glyph: “I wouldn't make a good crook, I'd be too happy about it.”
  • Beaker (on behalf of Hopps): “I can't see where I'm goin', but who needs to when you look this cool?”
  • Glyph: “1 is the mafia of prime numbers.”
  • Gauge: “You can only divide by zero with a TI-89 or above. Because there's no way you're destroying the universe for under 200 dollars.”
  • Glyph: “Everyone's happy! I'm happy, and I make up for everyone else.”
  • Grey: “I am the voice inside the voices inside my head's heads.”
  • Gauge: “Ow! I'm dead now...that's lame.”
  • Synk: “Violence! It's always on time.”
  • Grey: “In the lab, you can never see the sun, but you can always hear the rain.”
  • Pyrex: “I could have been a nerd--I chose not to.”
  • Synk: “Paco, shut up and graduate!”
  • Amp: “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hit you in the pancreas.”
  • Shutter: “You sir are brilliant; you have uncovered my scheme--now fall for it!”
  • Dozer: “Procurement underway, Captian!”
  • Pyrex: “You're an idiot! I hate myself!”
  • Grey: “I am physics, and sir, you are lying.”
  • Shutter: “Did you get all the cheese ninjas?”
  • Nutcracker: “I'm just trying to kill you. Just let it happen.”
  • Treads: “No icebergs in the hallway.”
  • Treads: “I am not a good communicator--I'd rather take Facebook quizzes.”
  • Synk: “I'm suspicious of the -ish.”
  • Shutter: “It's an intelligent MAG-LITE. It has nothing better to do than take over the world.”
  • Paco: “It takes a lot of energy keeping track of people keeping track of you.”
  • Wharf: “I was among the undead...I think I saw you across the killing field.”
  • Treads: “There's a special place in hell for what I said.”
  • Panic: “I do not file my pants.”
  • Pyrex: “If you think a girl likes you and you go to LeTourneau, you're probably wrong.”
  • Playdoh: “We need to tell him a new lie. This last one turned out to be true!”
  • Grey: “My death will be recorded because it will measure at least 8 on the Richter scale.”
  • Nutcracker: “My dream car doesn't even have brakes.”
  • Glyph: “Land mines are not good at kissing.”
  • Playdoh: “I'm sensing a high reading on the nerd-ometer.”
  • Shutter: “Yeah, the living customers are just a pain, all they do is cry.”
  • Playdoh: “You need to visit a lawn mower.”
  • Shutter: “Rousseau is dead.”
  • Grey: “Logic shall always triumph unless used against me.”
  • Dozer: “When asking a girl out, don't be an engineer. It helps.”
  • Grey: “I'm sorry, not even I'm that two dimensional.”
  • Dozer: “I brought you onto this floor, I can take you off!”
  • Zoot: “Let's try this again. This time without the fail.”
  • Suede: “Ripstick can't be used as a sword.”
  • Synk: “I love life--it's so stressful.”
  • Glyph: “That's not unfit--that's brilliant!”
  • Kick: “Sandwiches ought not be subjected to interrogation.”
  • Balto: “We have a limited ability to avoid fwump.”
  • Glyph: “If it wasn't for my professors I'd learn a whole lot more.”
  • Gauge: “We changed the mascot to a fire breathing dragon. We were going to train it to go over to ETBU, burn it, and carry back their women.”
  • Zoot: “Oh, thank you for pushing me down the berm yesterday!”
  • Vici: “It's like buy a car and get a free tire.”
  • Zoot: “Let's hope trees are bad at math.”
  • Synk: “Is this not the cutest little murder weapon you have ever seen?”
  • Treads: “It's usually proper to let the train hit you--not the other way around.”
  • Synk: “Can you be the public face of me?”
  • Riff (regarding girlfriends): “You're not a loser, Synk. You just haven't won yet.”
  • Play Doh: “Charge with the fury of a thousand crazy psychos!”
  • Glyph: “My mob is worse than your mob.”
  • Paco: “Nerds don't even need alcohol to be stupid.”
  • Play Doh: “It's good to keep a buffer of crazy people around you. It keeps out the riffraff.”
  • Beaker: “I don't think punching solves everything--sometimes you need to kick them as well.”
  • Riff: “Spiders invented coffee.”
  • Panic: “I can program your brain from right here.”
  • Shutter: “There you go with them big words again.”
  • Play Doh: “I'm begging you...with violence.”
  • Copper: “It's all about the execution.”
  • Nutcracker: “You will succumb to my giving you death.”
  • Synk: “Okay, he's a moron. But he has my respect and admiration.”
  • Shutter: “I want you to demonstrate a talent--other than shaving your legs.”
  • Touché: “I feel this instinctive need to disagree.”
  • Grey: “Your soul is overdrawn.”
  • Blue: “I speak to my wife using a teleprompt.”
  • Scorch: “My computer's favorite artist is Ozzy Osbourne.”
  • Treads: “It's Thursday again...do you have an escape plan?”
  • Grey: “I guarantee that you will not get showered on Tyler if you are on fire.”
  • Panic: “You're only allowed to commit suicide if you don't injure yourself.”
  • Shutter: “Do remember that PowerPoint is not pants.”
  • Play Doh: “I think I need to kill you soon, as that would be the path of most convenience.”
  • Synk: “Bring your face to my hand and slap yourself!”
  • Grey: “I'm accidentally suffocating myself on your shoulder.”
  • Mu Shu: “I'd give someone the benefit of the doubt...of existing.”
  • Play Doh: “Switch the light off--we need to shed blood.”
  • Ghillie: “I should do something productive. Does anyone want to go to IHOP?”
  • Glyph: “I have no clue what I'm drinking, but it tastes awesome!”
  • Touché: “Killing live people is way worse than killing dead people.”
  • Glyph: “Ignorance is bliss...I'm a very happy person.”
  • Play Doh: “Your counter example is flawed.”
  • Nutcracker: “Are you trying to act like celery?”
  • Play Doh: “Move! MOVE!! I mean, 'Move the knife into my hand. Gently.'”
  • Glyph: “If it isn't a tradition you can't have an anti-tradition of that non-tradition.”
  • Zoot: “I want a squeedily spooch.”
  • Dozer: “The knives keep coming closer.”
  • Balto: “You need a caffeinated hug.”
  • Kick: “I'm being attacked by crabs.”
  • Shutter: “I'm new to this whole controlling space-time thing.”
  • Copper: “Why are you embracing the refrigerator?”
  • Dozer: “BAM! My clothes are gone!”
  • Wharf: “What's the point of being dead if you can't go around and bug people?”
  • Dozer: “You lose years of your life by going to college.”
  • Shutter: “I thought that was highly illegal and you would be instantly killed by the ghost of Corey Ross.”
  • Synk: “Look out Indian telemarketing companies! The mountains are coming!”
  • Panic: “Fifteen-hundred pages of badly written nonsense.”
  • Play Doh: “Sometimes to heal the person you have to chop off their head.”
  • Panic: “I believe in polluting the environment to the max.”
  • Kick: “Grey, you left your screwdriver in my room, so I took the liberty of giving it a dress and naming it Denise.”
  • Glyph: “Whoa! I can't say these big words--it's more than three syllables.”
  • Grey: “Excuse me, I out-nerd you.”
  • Treads: “That's a really intense picture of a grape.”
  • Grey: “I am going to highlight your boredom by singing '99 bottles of beer on the wall.'”
  • Play Doh: “Soap doesn't wash out nerd.”
  • Gauge: “Oh, I forgot...I have my girlfriend in my room.”
  • Synk: “I always die in these stories.”
  • Shutter: “I had a sworn enemy in highschool who was an engineer--which is better than what you've got.”
  • Synk: “I have nightmares for glasses.”
  • Shutter: “You can't take things into the afterlife like that.”
  • Ghillie: “I'll figure it out and then you'll become the fragment of my imagination.”
  • Shutter: “No, you missed it; you either leave your roommate very happy or very dead--no in between, you see?”
  • Zoot: “Now count to infinity! Dance monkey, dance!”
  • Wharf: “Proof by exhaustion is not a valid proof.”
  • Shutter: “Perhaps I should install a safe--to put my clothes in.”
  • Play Doh: “I need a robot to do my vacuuming; I'm totally incompetent.”
  • Grey: “I'm dead, but I carry it well.”
  • Smalls: “I love killing the planet--the sooner we kill it the sooner we get to leave.”
  • Dozer: “I can fine you with premeditated uncleanliness.”
  • Grey: “There will be demon rabbits inhabiting our lounge?.”
  • Copper: “I hate it when I change my pants.”
  • Treads: “They're not sharp, they're pointy.”
  • Synk: “I love you so much--in a really not-awkward way.”
  • Grey: “As long as its a good corruption.”
  • Paco: “I think it's more along the lines of 'why are you still here, you heathen?'”
  • Beaker: “What's the definition of a good nuke life?”
  • Treads: “I have a roommate who causes rips in the space-time continuum--it's kinda hard to be on time when you live with that.”
  • Grey: “That is all manner of not right!”
  • Panic: “I'll sell your flashdrive back to you for $5.99.”
  • Vici: “There's gotta be an easier way to break stuff.”
  • Crikey: “That's what you do, isn't it? Brainwash little children.”
  • Paco: “You have the wrong personality for someone who doesn't like to be shot.”
  • Synk: “That's why we make Teflon; so that nowdays, when you kill someone, you CAN get the blood off your hands.”
  • Kick: “What would you do if you saw a squid running at 70 mph?.”
  • Panic: “That is not an official occupant of that room.”
  • Brett: “Some things in life are Hobo.”
  • Panic: “Hypothetically, you need to turn on your brain.”
  • Synk: “I'm better at breaking things.”
  • Kick: “I can't wait to see the bear that's going to emerge from your chin.”
  • Panic: “I don't want people's bones behind our couch.”
  • Synk: “Dancing is a sin--especially when I do it.”
  • Grey: “I live where there's normal people--I frighten them.”
  • Kick: “I'm going to mix wine and grapejuice. And what I mean by that is I'm going to mix Sprite and grapejuice.”
  • Synk: “Now my mind has a screensaver.”
  • Pebble: “If you find yourself splattered in vomit in a few minutes, take me to the hospital, would ya?”
  • Mu shu: “I sleep almost every day.”
  • Synk: “You've tortured midgets to make your product.”
  • Ghillie: “They would come from 27 miles away--with a paddle.”
  • Wharf: “I came for 25 cents of happiness.”
  • Synk: “Why is my life being narrated?”
  • Treads: “He's making out with the cream soda.”
  • Synk: “Excuse me as my paranoia shifts into overdrive.”
  • Crikey: “The world's perspiring against you.”
  • Synk: “I've drunk from the same flask as Dr. G.!”
  • Glyph: “If you don't want to think, that's your choice.”
  • Paco: “That's not my problem--I sell shirts, not relationships.”
  • Frisbee: “The sheep with bling!?! That was awesome!.”
  • Play Doh: “Pirouetting is not for engineers.”
  • Balto: “We're paradoxical; we're very smart and very stupid at the same time.”
  • Wharf: “So, what if the robot creates a sentient bunny?.”
  • Paco: “I have a very exothermic reaction taking place inside my lungs.”
  • Synk: “That would be awesome; suicide bees!.”
  • Play Doh: “Apparently I was making the assumption that you are stupid.”
  • Nutcracker: “Y'all need to die.”
  • Paco: “I hereby separate you from yourself for the rest of the evening.”
  • Play Doh: “How do you take the integral of a hat... over a mushroom... with respect to a circle? I don't know.”
  • Grey: “Subject to this offense, Dozer will break your body and Grey will eat your mind. May God have mercy on your soul.”
  • Dozer: “I hate that light with an undying passion of a thousand jaguars.”
  • Play Doh: “I want to get funding to go bungee-jumping into a black hole.”
  • Kick: “Wouldn't it be so cool if you had to like, make out with a superhero everytime you wanted your pez?.”
  • Pebble: “It's largely painless after you pass out.”
  • Synk: “With the world in flames, there's a lot more that you can do than roast marshmallows.”
  • Kick: “But isn't it useful random math crap?”
  • Dozer: “I as your RA am required to threaten you often.”
  • Grey: “Your brain will be quite active--and then it won't be.”
  • Dozer: “Yes, I can kill you with chopsticks.”
  • Jester: “We exist to become freshmen.”
  • Dozer: “Oh my goodness! 9 volts across my heart!.”
  • Panic: “You shouldn't be reading a book while you drive.”
  • Dozer (on behalf of Synk): “If held at gunpoint, I will do what I am told. If held at knifepoint I will be a servant.”
  • Dozer: “I'm not the victim; I make victims.”
  • Play Doh: “You should hang out with Shutter; his professed hobby is being bored.”
  • Paco: “How healthy do you need to be?”
  • Dozer: “Dr. Graff isn't scary...he's crazy!”
  • Synk: “I found numbers!”
  • Play Doh: “Life has to start before you can kill it.”
  • Nutcracker: “I have singing pants.”
  • Paco: “Do you know how many monkeys died for that pudding?.”
  • Beaker: “Depending on whose blood it is, it will either be left there or cleaned up shortly thereafter.”
  • Grey: “Hurricanes are more fun when you don't have shelter.”
  • Dozer: “Turn that frown upside down, soldier.”
  • Mu shu: “Totally tubular.”
  • Crunchy: “I'm missing my life.”
  • Paco: “You're killing my pizazz!”
  • Dozer: “I want my bacon!”
  • Play Doh: “Biology isn't the study of life--it's the study of everything that can destroy life.”
  • Grey: “Just because I've offset my center of gravity by a reasonable amount doesn't mean anything.”
  • Dozer: “I reserve the right to kill anyone.”
  • Paco: “It is not alive--it is a binary conglomerate.”
  • Slurpee: “If something bad happens I probably did it.”
  • Synk: “I hate everything.”
  • Kick: “I'll sell out my brothers for $65.”
  • Slurpee: “I welded my roommate to his wife.”
  • Rook: “I do what beer does except cheaper.”
  • Paco: “Act your species.”
  • Kick: “Don't tell me you've never wanted to plug a whale's blowhole with burning tobacco.”
  • Nutcracker: “Give me donut or give me death!”
  • Joust: “That requires money, this just requires the risk of destroying expensive equipment.”
  • Synk: “Be here, or the ethernet cable gets it.”
  • Play Doh: “I guess you're the dictator then.”
  • Grey: “I'm not a cross product, because cross products are normal.”
  • Shutter: “Define real life... the analog world.”
  • Panic: “If I'm gonna die, I'd rather not have homework to do.”
  • Kick: “I don't know what you said but I think it's bad theology.”
  • Frisbee: “You're an engineer, you'll build crap - there you go.”
  • Joust: “Best if used by the apocalypse.”
  • Kick: “Anything over a hundred volts is gonna do something to a pickle.”
  • Ghillie: “I'm detrimental to your health.”
  • Panic: “When I get a buffer overflow error listening to you, it's not good.”
  • Grey: “It has somehow ended in Stack getting a trained monkey.”
  • Vault: “I have a tolerance of plus or minus Tom.”
  • Zoot: “It's a fine line between 'proper programming' and insanity”
  • Beaker: “I'm feelin' the love... and it's way over there somewhere.”
  • Pebble: “Get back in front of the computer, nerd!”
  • Crikey: “There's no point in them living if they're not all gonna die.”
  • Paco: “Great, a bomb with Alzheimer's.”
  • Grey: “I hate to be a prophet of doom but...DOOM!”
  • Synk: “I have Kidney Stones--I mean Cornerstones--with Dr. DeBoer.”
  • Wasabi: “Programming in java is like dancing with an elephant--it's hard to do, but if you can do it you'll have the floor all to yourself.”
  • Coda: “It's a terrible world.”
  • Sparrow: “That's a joke.”
  • Grey: “It's amazing what you can accomplish with little more than a positive attitude and an acetylene torch.”
  • Trolley: “It's kinda past my speaking curfew.”
  • Slurpee: “I'm in charge; I'm not quite sure why.”
  • Shrug: “You can breath in SAGA and get calories.”
  • Grey: “Put aside the teenager—and become the nerd you were born to be.”
  • Blue: “Ah, the wonders of stupidity.”
  • Jester: “Sure the program works, as long as the planets align, the phase of the moon is correct, and you’re wearing the right tie.”
  • Panic: “Operation stay-awake; mission status: failed!”
  • Grey: “You might as well give your soul to God because you sure aren’t graduating with it.”
  • Fjord: “Llama.”
  • Ludwhig: “This homework stuff is all relative—relative to how bad I want a chocolate milkshake.”
  • Dozer: “Chemistry and I have a hate-hate anger relationship.”